Soccer Book Review: Brian Boyd on "Bloody Confused" by Chuck Culpepper

We at the PWT-blog don't just sit around and watch soccer all day.  We're more refined than that.  We also read about soccer, and today, I present to you friend of the PWT-blog Brian Boyd's review of the Chuck Culpepper soccer book called "Bloody Confused! A Clueless American Sportswriter Seeks Solace in English Soccer".

I just finished reading "Bloody Confused!" and as a fan of soccer and the English Premier League it is both entertaining and informative. Chuck Culpepper decides that in the 2006 / 2007 season he is going to follow one team in the English Premier League as a fan. He chooses Portsmouth FC that plays in Fratton Park.

He describes so well for us the highs and lows that true soccer converts feel as they follow their team. For example, Portsmouth in this season remains highly ranked all year and can move up with a win over Fulham FC in Craven Cottage. Portsmouth goes up 1 - 0 on an early goal and Chuck describes the agony of watching your team hang on minute by minute through the second half as the home team pounds your goal. He writes, "We even made it to ninety minutes, and through a good bit of the four minutes of added time. Added time had begun at 4:51pm, but I couldn't be sure how many seconds had passed within that minute, so I felt confused. I reached the point where you think just one or two more solid defensive plays might finish off matters."

Fulham nets a goal in the waning seconds of added time tying the score. The Portsmouth faithful feel as if they lost 3 - 0 and despair sets in. After games like this one, they end up drinking enough beer in a pub to "numb a yak".

The next week Portsmouth plays Manchester United, who is vying for the title, at Fratton Park. Portsmouth again goes up 1 - 0 early in the game and again agony sets in. Then in the 88th minute, Rio Ferdinand of Manchester United passes back to goalie Edwin van der Saar and somehow the ball rolls and rolls and rolls and ends up in the net. Chuck describes it as being in slow motion and somehow shock registered throughout Fratton Park. He writes "So as Fratton Park palpably went from this moment of vague confusion to this moment of grand realization, and as the realization seemed to spend a lagging second creeping up the rows and across the sections and into the top corners and the wigs and the drummers and the buglers and at least one blue bear, and as I began to absorb the truth probably another second after everybody else, something happened to me that I would not confess to just anybody. I cried. I hopped and hopped in disbelief, and the tears rolled."

Any true convert to soccer has experienced the highs (elation) and lows (depression) that accompanies the wins, draws, and losses of your team.

If you want to find out what is being sung in some of the songs, what the fans think of the center referee, how you buy tickets, how you travel to and from games, what watching from an English Pub is like, and much more, then this book is for you.

"After a year following the biggest league on earth, I may know a little about a little and not much about much, but I do know one thing. I think it's hard to be a fan."

Enjoy!!

World Cup on 730 the Ump? Bud House, Soccer HoF, and Cool Book

World Cup Matches On Local Radio?
It appears that ESPN will broadcast all of the matches from the World Cup in addition to it's radio affiliates in addition to TV, internet and mobile device coverage. EPL Talk is reporting that everyone's favorite leprechaun soccer analyst, Tommy Smyth, will be providing the color for the broadcasts. Zack Bennett, the program director for 730 The UMP was noncommital when contacted to verify whether the local ESPN Radio affiliate would be airing the broadcasts, "We have not announced our intentions concerning World Cup coverage for the 2010 event, and we cannot comment at the current time." PWT-blog will let you know, if they decide to air any of the coverage.


King of Beers Looking For World Cup Fans
I'm not a big fan of some of Bud's products, but I like some of their commercials and they do sponsor soccer in a big way. Well, this publicity stunt looks right up my alley. Budweiser is looking for fans from each country in the World Cup to be in what looks to be some sort of Real World: World Cup edition called Bud House. Check it out. Although, I'll warn you now. There's a 14 page application and they will expect you to drink their beer!


Soccer Hall of Fame Is Leaving Oneonta
Seriously, where the heck is Oneonta? Maybe that's one reason the US Soccer Hall of Fame is closing its doors. It's rumored that many of the exhibits will be housed in MLS stadiums where soccer fans actually can see them. Good move.


Cool new book

This is an ad for what looks to be a pretty cool book coming out in May with the personal accounts from many of the sports greatest players about how they came to love the game. Could be a great gift for the soccerhead in your family.

A Beautiful Game by Tom Watt from harperone on Vimeo.

A Few Things

UAH Coach/Players Honored By GSC

GSC Coach of the Year and UAH Head Coach Tafadzwa Ziyenge

University of Alabama-Huntsville Head Coach Tafadzwa Ziyenge has been named Gulf South Conference coach of the year after guiding the Chargers to an undefeated conference season and second seed in the conference tournament.

Also, honored by the GSC were senior defender Devon Schleif and junior goalkeeper Tyler Earley who were name to the All-conference first team. UAH was also represented on the second team by senior Brian Hadley and Tomoaki Matsuo.

Soccernomics: Moneyball For Soccer Geeks


Moneyball was the seminal sports book about the business side of baseball and how the A's GM Billy Beane was able to scout players using statistical analysis instead of the tried and true methods that had been used by generations of previous baseball clubs. Well, when I heard that Soccernomics was coming out, it made it to the top of my Amazon.com Wish-list because it takes a look at soccer with the same kind of critical eye to uncover some surprising nuggets. The author Simon Kuper has been all over the soccer blogosphere lately and here is the best of the interviews.

Southern Soccer Is Looking For Your Help


The guys over at Southern Soccer are looking for ways to improve the tournaments that they offer the Huntsville soccer public. There running a survey here. So, head on over and click away.

Guest Post: Random Musings on Soccer Lit Part 4

I've asked one of the most well read guys I know, Chris Shaffer, who is the team manager for Rocket City United, to do a post on some of the "soccer books" that he's read. Now, if you know Chris, you'll know that he does not have a loss for words. So, I've had to break up his list into a few parts. This is the final part of Chris's list. Here's part one, part two, and part three.

Futebol: The Brazilian Way of Life, Alex Bellos


Well-written, researched and presented with an uncommon understanding of the wholesale manner in which soccer permeates EVERY facet of Brazilian society and culture, Bellos demonstrates why Brazil produces so much soccer talent and why Brazil will probably continue to win nearly one of every two world cup finals. My fondest memory from this book (I do not have a copy at hand) has to do with fringe players in the Brazilian professional scene and their deep-seated desire to play professionally in Europe. Two young Brazilian players, co-opted by their agent, no doubt, end up playing professionally in the Faroe Islands. Yes, technically Europe, but…yikes. Unfortunately the guys are perpetually cold, homesick, and must work part time in a fish cannery to make ends meet. The witch doctor planting ritualistic objects around the Vasco de Gama ground also stands out. Silly? How about all that Boston Red Sox stuff they found in newly poured concrete at the new Yankee Stadium?

“Gazza Agonistes,” Ian Hamilton


Technically this piece on former England midfielder Paul Gascoigne is an article, but an extremely long one. It can be found in the December 1993 UK literary magazine “Granta.” This can be purchased on Amazon…I checked. Amazon wasn’t around when I got my hands on it. Oddly enough, the editor of issue #45 of “Granta” is none other than the aforementioned Bill Buford, not the former Yes and King Crimson drummer. I include this article here for two reasons: 1.) it was the first serious piece about soccer I ever read, and 2.) for those too young to have seen Paul Gascgoigne play at his peak and even for those who did, his talent, vision and creativity were such as almost never seen in English footballers. Indeed, his skills were reminiscent of South American or Mediterranean distributing midfielders. The fact this his story ended up fitting the sad cliché of talent squandered on booze and sloth, and perhaps some serious mental health issues, was apparent even at the time this piece was first released.

Fever Pitch, Nick Hornby


By virtue of being an Arsenal fan, I hereby recuse myself from reviewing this book. Let’s just say it’s a lot like everything else Hornby has written: adult male, seemingly doing alright, is really an immature boy at heart and desperately needs to grow up.

Guest Post: Random Musings on Soccer Lit Part 3

I've asked one of the most well read guys I know, Chris Shaffer, who is the team manager for Rocket City United, to do a post on some of the "soccer books" that he's read. Now, if you know Chris, you'll know that he does not have a loss for words. So, I've had to break up his list into a few parts. This is part three of Chris's list. Here's part one and part two.

Morbo: The Story of Spanish Football, Phil Ball


No English language writer knows Spanish football better than Phil Ball. A longtime resident of San Sebastian (he recently returned to the UK after a decade in Spain) and spouse of a Spaniard, he speaks the language, knows the game, and perhaps most importantly, understands how powerful regionalism is in its affect on Spanish history, culture and sport. Morbo is a serious book, and if understanding the Real Madrid-FC Barcelona rivalry through the lens of Catalan nationalism vis-à-vis Franco’s fascism is not your idea of a good time, this may not be the book for you. For those who persevere, however, the payoff is great. Who knew that Huelva is the cradle of Spanish Football? Is there enough Basque football talent to keep Atletic de Bilboa in La Liga in the coming years, or will their management be forced to field non-Basque players?

Once in a Lifetime: The Incredible Story of the New York Cosmos, Gavin Newsham


It usually bodes poorly for a book’s prospects when the cover is festooned with the words “now a major motion picture,” and Once in a Lifetime is no exception. Author Gavin Newsham of the Brit-Tabloid school of journalism provides an intimate (read: anything racy, lewd or embarrassing) portrait of the bizarre colossus that was the New York Cosmos. Newsham, who also wrote Letting the Big Dog Eat, a biography of John Daly (one of the few professional golfers colorful [or stupid] enough to be tabloid fodder), is particularly brutal on Georgio Chinaglia. On second thought, maybe there is something to like about this book.

Among the Thugs, Bill Buford


Hooliganism used to be known as “The English Disease,” but those days are passed, along with the Falklands War, Maggie Thatcher, and the ultra-right National Front, a UK political party heavy on xenophobia, racism and soccer hooliganism. Hooliganism at its height in England in the 1980’s wasn’t solely the purview of the National Front, as Buford makes clear, but was symptomatic of English societal issues that, mercifully, have changed as has the socio-economic background of the average English soccer fan. As a glimpse back in time, Buford’s study has some value. However, his self-righteousness following his immersion in and, at least tacit encouragement of hooliganism smacks of hypocrisy. In today’s world, serious hooliganism is far more of a problem in Italy and Argentina than in England, although Millwall fans alone, perhaps to compensate for the quality of their side’s play, seem to cling pathetically to violence that’s twenty years out of date in England and never was anything about which to be proud.

Chris covers the final three books in his list in Part 4.

Guest Post: Random Musings on Soccer Lit Part 2

I've asked one of the most well read guys I know, Chris Shaffer, who is the team manager for Rocket City United, to do a post on some of the "soccer books" that he's read. Now, if you know Chris, you'll know that he does not have a loss for words. So, I've had to break up his list into a few parts. Here is part two of Chris's list. Part one can be found here.

Soccer in Sun and Shadow, Eduardo Galeano


Uruguayan novelist and poet Eduardo Galeano’s Soccer in Sun and Shadow is written in sparsely beautiful language. This is neither a novel nor a history, but rather Galeano’s musings on the world game presented in a roughly chronological context. The book begins with the “Author’s Confession”: ‘Like all Uruguayan children, I wanted to be a soccer player. I played quite well, in fact I was terrific, but only at night when I was asleep.’ Galeano provides similar moments of mirth throughout, but the book is not all sunshine and lollipops. To wit, ‘The history of soccer is a sad voyage from beauty to duty. When the sport became an industry, the beauty that blossoms from the joy of play got torn out by its very roots. In this fin-de-siecle world, professional soccer condemns all that is useless, and useless means not profitable.’ Some of Galeano’s subject matter is vague or general, some quite specific and even obscure, but the quality of his prose and the applicability of so much of the content to life’s grand themes render this a special book, one that can be appreciated even by (gasp) someone with no interest in the game.

The Miracle of Castel di Sangro: A Tale of Passion and Folly in the Heart of Italy, Joe McGinnis


That rarest of birds, a worthwhile book about the beautiful game written by an American, in this case New England journalist Joe McGinnis. For a season in the mid-1990’s, McGinnis follows the fortunes of an obscure provincial side that miraculously (hence the title) has won promotion to Serie B, the second flight of Calcio Italiano and serious professional soccer. The main theme centers on the team’s struggle to avoid immediate relegation back to the Serie C regional leagues, although McGinnis manages to weave a mobbed-up team owner and player involvement in cocaine dealing into the mix. How credible this material is, is anyone’s guess. McGinnis sure did burn his bridges when this was published, and the book does reinforce notions of corruption in Italian soccer (notions may be the wrong word here). Some memorable scenes include McGinnis, upon traveling back to New England for the Christmas holiday after being immersed in Castel di Sangro’s tortuous Serie B campaign for five months, bewildered and uninterested in his friends excitement over the Patriots’ Super Bowl prospects.

Behind the Curtain: Football in Eastern Europe, Jonathan Wilson


Wilson’s work is the best (and only) English language study of the (relatively) current state of footballing affairs in Eastern European nations formerly in the Soviet sphere. He also includes those pieces of the former Yugoslavia, since Tito forged a separate path to socialism. I digress. While the rollback of communism undoubtedly provided more freedom and self-determination (nationalistically speaking) for the peoples of these former communist states, it did not help their soccer clubs. With their new market-oriented economies and the advent of Bosman Ruling free agency in Europe in 1995, former eastern powers could not afford to hold on to talent they had developed. The story is even more complex than that, but that’s where the book comes in. Wilson uses personal contacts in the Ukraine (surprise: the Ukranian mafia has huge influence at Dynamo Kiev), and elsewhere to glean insights beyond the obvious, e.g. the Ukranian mafia has huge influence at Dynamo Kiev. Fascinating trips to Armenian clubs and the story of perhaps the greatest Russian player of all time spending his prime years in Siberia make for compelling reading. The incipient return of Russian clubs to the highest reaches of UEFA (see Zenit St. Petersburg, winners of the 2008 UEFA Cup), and progress in the Ukraine, the future looks brighter for at least the bigger nations of the former Soviet bloc.

Chris covers three more books in Part 3.

Guest Post: Random Musings on Soccer Lit Part 1

I've asked one of the most well read guys I know, Chris Shaffer, who is the team manager for Rocket City United, to do a post on some of the "soccer books" that he's read. Now, if you know Chris, you'll know that he does not have a loss for words. So, I've had to break up his list into a few parts. Here is part one of Chris's list.

When Ryan asked if I would do a piece on soccer-related books, I told him that after I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. As it turns out, I had already read enough soccer-related literature beforehand to at least contribute something. The following is in no way intended to be comprehensive and is not listed or ranked in any particular order. As some of these books are no longer in my possession (you know who you are, beneficiaries of my book-loving largess), I cannot attest to the accuracy of anything I thought I might remember from any specific book.

I did not include a number of books I have read for obvious reasons. Some examples: ghostwritten player biographies, some written while the player is still active. This is all garbage and self-serving tripe, “all England need is me at captain and Terry Venables back as manager and the World Cup is ours,” well you get the idea. Also excluded, books written for American audiences serving up ridiculous platitudes about, say, explaining the world through a sport. My apologies if my mixed use of soccer/football is confusing.

A Season with Verona: Travels around Italy in Search of Illusion, National Character and…Goals, Tim Parks

Parks, an Englishman and university professor in Verona, brings excellent writing and informed perceptions as he covers a Serie A season with the club he supports, Hellas (yes, as in Hellenic or Greek) Verona, the giallo-blue. But Chris, Chievo is the team from Verona in Serie A, right? Well, they are now, but a decade or more ago they were suburban outsiders and Hellas was THE club of the city that provides the setting of Shakespeare’s “Romeo and Juliette.” Parks chronicles both parochialism, the north/south divide, out of control tifosi and the even worse away-game police, as Hellas takes to the road with its hard-core supporters (tifosi) in tow. Among the many cogent points Parks makes, his conspiracy theory that the powers that be in Italian football want to see Hellas Verona out of Serie A and Chievo elevated as the replacement might ring hollow in other contexts. This, however, is Calcio Italiano, where real conspiracies occur with alarming regularity.


Playing the Moldovans at Tennis, Tony Hawks

In the tradition of English Travel Lit, see, for example, Eric Newby’s A Short Walk in the Hindu Kush for perhaps the finest example of this, Tony Hawk predicates his intrepid tale on a bet with friend made while England are playing Moldova (who? being the idea here) in a World Cup Qualifier. Hawk claims he can beat every Moldovan national team player in a tennis match. Hijinks in decaying former Soviet Republic ensue. Hawk, unfortunately, is no Eric Newby, and subtle, dry wit is often foregone for puerile efforts at humor. As a man who still finds sophomoric scatological humor funny, however, I laughed a lot.


The Rough Guide to European Football: A Fans Handbook, Simon Evans and Peterjon Cresswell

Designed specifically as a travel guide for soccer tourism in continental Europe, its primary audience being British, The Rough Guide makes surprisingly interesting reading, even if one has no travel plans any time soon. On the practical side, the book touches on subjects like the safest, quickest means of getting to and from every major stadium in every major nation in Europe. Tourist meccas like Moldova are not included. Of particular use is the foreign language phrase guide, providing the traveler with the means to buy two tickets and two beers in almost every language in Europe. Brilliant! Of more general interest, the book provides historical context for the game on a country-by-country basis, tackles promotion/relegation protocols in each league as well as the nature of national cup competitions in its ‘Up for the Cup’ segments. One caveat: the book can become dated, as my most recent copy has, what with Leeds United listed under EPL Champions’ League participants.

Chris covers three more books in Part 2.

Cool Stuff

DirecTV offers UEFA Champions League Mix

OMG!!! I'm as giddy as a 10 year old girl at a Jonas Bros concert!!!

If you are a DirecTV customer (like I am), you can now get all of the Champions League matches live in one spot. Channels 461-466 have been converted to the UEFA Champions League Mix where you can see all of the coverage provided by FSC and the other Fox outlets. DirecTV does this sort of thing for big sporting events. I just watched a bunch of the PGA Championship this weekend on their PGA Championship Mix package. It's pretty awesome. You don't have to guess which regional networks are showing the games. Just flip to the mix channels and they're all there.

Screenshot of the DirecTV UEFA Champions League Mix channel lineup

If you haven't switched to DirecTV, here's another reason to do so, stat!


Jozy Shoots An ESPN Commercial

USMNT forward Jozy Altidore has been in Bristol, CT this week shooting a commercial for ESPN while waiting for his work permit to be completed. According to his tweets, it should be "mad cool".

Another Soccer Book?


Just read this excellent excerpt from Financial Times sports columnist Simon Kuper's soon to be released book, Soccernomics: Why England Loses, Why Germany and Brazil Win, and Why the U.S., Japan, Australia, Turkey--and Even Iraq--Are Destined to Become the Kings of the World's Most Popular Sport.

TV Updates And Other Tidbits

ESPN Announces Unprecedented Coverage of World Cup 2010
"The Network" has announced that it will provide over 65 hours of on-site coverage of the World Cup. Here are the highlights.

• SportsCenter at the FIFA World Cup;
• World Cup Live – the daily, 30-minute news, highlights and analysis program (30 episodes) aired each night of the tournament on ESPN or ESPN2;
• Live 30-minute pre-match, halftime (15 min.) and post-match shows on ABC, ESPN and ESPN2;
• World Cup segments on ESPNEWS, First Take on ESPN2, and Outside the Lines.

How We Follow Up That Performance
A decidedly different looking US Men's National Team will follow up the incredible Confederations Cup run with a run out in the Gold Cup tournament that they won in '07 to qualify for the Confed Cup. Coach Bob Bradley will use a squad made up of mostly untested players who did not participate in the Confed Cup. Jacob over at Southern soccer has all the info on how you can catch the games on TV.


Huntsville Times Caught Up In Soccer Fever
The Huntsville Times ran a recent story about where the interest the USA v Brazil final has garnered, and where in the Valley you could go to watch the game.


Beckham Book Provides Juicy Gossip
Grant Wahl is a terrific soccer scribe and his soon to be released tell-all book about the machinations of the Beckham move to the LA Galaxy is sure to raise some eyebrows. Check out an exerpt of the book here.


Jacob Chimes In
Our buddy Jacob drops some knowledge about the recent Confed Cup performance and some other tidbits on his blog.